Sabbatical Space

What I Want to Keep from Sabbatical

Posted on June 18, 2019June 13, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

If you read last week’s musing blog post, two posts ago, you know that I’ve been considering how to keep the sabbatical pace when I return to Nashville.

Watching the sun set over Crater Lake with a cup of hot tea.

I need to define what I want to keep. During the last six months, I had two things that I needed to get done: write a book and rest. We also homeschooled, traveled, visited friends and family, and kept up with work, but the entire time, I was extremely clear about those two objectives. It wasn’t all I did, but it was all I that knew must be done.

I wrote a chapter a week and slept more, adapting rest to sunrise and sunset. I had highly focused writing time in the morning, and family exploring in the afternoons. I read books for fun to rest my mind, and journal articles to include in my chapters. It was a great balance between writing and rest. Because of that, it was easy to feel successful. That is what I want to keep going forward.

After watching me write for months, Z asked if he could write a book, too.
He’s writing a story about his new stuffed animal, a pika named Brownie.

I want just a few clear priorities that balance each other. I want to trust that other important things will also get done, but only those few things are essential. Life back home felt like playing tennis with ball machine locked on super sonic speed. A better pace means only one ball at a time, spaced apart.

Another thing I want is time with my family. When it comes to relationships, quantity is important. One of my favorite things this trip was asking the kids about their high/low of the day. Lately, we’ve changed it to looking for something great that happened. Most days, it is a difficult choice to pick just one great thing. When we hike, I get to learn about the kids because we have time to talk. I am a counselor, so I really value this talk time!

Back home, I worked a lot. My husband jokes that my job is flexible. I can work my 80 hours a week any time I want. I don’t work THAT much, but I was writing in the early mornings, trying to add homeschool instruction in the mornings, going to work, and teaching graduate classes a couple of evenings a week. We had very few family hikes, and I was so tired that I didn’t think to ask about the high/low when I got home. I want to do a better job of protecting that quantity of time together.

Finally, I was able to be flexible on this sabbatical trip. I am a planner married to Mr. Spontaneity. All too often back home, Tim would ask me to do something spur of the moment, but I had not planned for it, so he’d often go without me. He didn’t have a partner to have fun with, and his wife would often be bummed about missing the fun.

We both needed the fun outing together, but I couldn’t switch everything I had planned around fast enough. On this trip, I’ve learned a few things that allow me to still plan, but with the flexibility and time cushion to adapt. It helped tremendously to not have so many plates spinning. I secretly loved not always knowing where we be the next day or how long we would stay.

These things aren’t easy for me, but there are the three things from sabbatical that I want to maintain when we get home. Maybe simplifying for sabbatical can have a lasting impact.

Simplify projects – only two to three complementary projects at a time.
Simplify scheduling – leave open chunks of family time.
Simplify planning – keep a flexible weekly (not daily) plan that allows spontaneity.

Those who do not move, do not notice their chains.
Rosa Luxemburg

The Beach, Volcanos and a Big Bison

Posted on June 15, 2019June 13, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

This week was full and fun, but a bit bittersweet. It marked the end of our trip out, and the beginning of our trip home, and it may have been the best one yet for our son A.

A sandy stroll down South Cannon Beach towards Haystack Rock. ZA is holding a crab.

We knew from the beginning that we were heading to Oregon to renew our vows, and so our Oregon visit ended with a long stroll down Cannon Beach to Haystack Rock, a protected ecosystem with lots of tidepool dwellers.

Z learning about feeding
ZA practicing milking
Trying 3 kinds of cheese

After a visit to the Tillamook factory (they make dairy products like cheese and ice cream), we headed inland toward Portland and captivating views of four of the Seven Sisters, a chain of volcanos that stretch from Mt. Shasta in California to Mt. Rainier in Washington. On this day we could see Mounts Hood, St. Helens, Adams and Rainier. Given that these are active volcanoes, and we had already seen what could happen at Mount Mazama (which formed Crater Lake), it was awesome and a little frightening, a prelude for what came next.

We sadly left Oregon and entered Washington, taking advantage of cool weather and clear skies to see and learn about Mount St. Helens. It erupted in 1980, when I was 9. Some days, you can still see it steaming. A loves natural disasters (thankfully not from personal experience), and he couldn’t wait to watch the visitor center movie multiple times.

Mount St. Helens and the Toutle River 39 years later.

We saw firsthand where the side of the volcano blew out hummocks (pieces of the mountain), and leveled forests for miles. We saw Spirit Lake, where there were no survivors, and the new lakes created. We saw the Toutle River, which rushed lava, debris and floating pumice rocks downstream. We counted the natural disasters that happened together: earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, avalanches, mudslides, and flooding.

Hiking the Hummocks Trail
Working on the Junior Geologist Badge

The kids learned history, geology and botany as they completed their junior geologist badges. Later, we listened to the audio book I Survived the Eruption of Mount St. Helens.

You can see on the left side where the eruption blew out the mountain.

From there, we drove to Puget Sound to visit Tim’s other sister in Poulsbo, Washington. It was like being at an RV Resort just for us. The weather was delightfully cool, and the dog got to run free in a big yard.

Aunt Shanda and Uncle Dave took us to a drive-through game park, a first for us. We fed deer, yaks, llamas, Kodiak bears, and bison, some retired from acting careers. Oh, the bison were huge, brushing against the side of the car and poking their enormous heads in the windows for a snack. We also drove close to wolves, racoons, peacocks, tigers, and an aquarium.

Bear
Yak
Big Bison

After that, we visited Fort Worden, where part of the film An Officer and a Gentleman was filmed. The coolest part was the underground bunkers, pitch black without a flashlight. Although now part of Washington parks, during the World Wars, this was a strategic site guarding the entrance to Puget Sound and an important Navy Port. The kids found some friends and played an amazing game of hide and seek. The adults enjoyed the ocean views more.

The bunkers through the bottom opening were used to store ammunition.
Tim’s sister, Shanda, was determined
to get a photo of him.

On Sunday after church, Dave’s children and their kids came over for a cookout, and our kids were delighted to meet new cousins. If volcanos and a bear weren’t enough to wow A this week, then Uncle Dave’s 4-wheelers certainly did. He went to bed thinking about it, and woke up asking to ride again. I think he might have smelled exhaust in his dreams.

A rode the small one by himself. Even pink couldn’t deter him.

Aunt Shanda sent us off with clean clothes, her famous homemade almond roca, a bag of snacks for the road, and fond memories. Then we officially started heading home, back to Tennessee with a sad sniff and a wistful wave.

Uncle Dave giving ZA a driving lesson. He has the best toys!

That’s as far as we had loosely planned. What will we see on the way home?

The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.
Eleanor Roosevelt

The Clock Is Ticking

Posted on June 14, 2019June 13, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

The Clock Is Ticking

I have been procrastinating on writing this blog for the last few days. I usually enjoy these blog posts, but I found myself putting it off repeatedly, so I asked why.

Today, I am ready to deal with why I wanted to distance myself from this next post. Today, we are officially beginning to head Joshua’s hood toward home. Today, the countdown begins for when we need to be home. We have three weeks, 21 days.

That sounds like a long time if you think of this as a vacation. A three-week vacation in the United States is long and luxurious. But we aren’t on vacation. This is a sabbatical trip, and it has been our way of life since January.

This 21-day ticking clock is more like a moving date drawing ever closer while we still have so much we want to do. The thing is, I don’t want to move. I just want my yard to keep moving as we travel in our home.

Once we get home, life will go back to what normal was before we left. That’s what I needed the sabbatical away from. I want to hang on to this pace of life, this time with the kids, and this chance to reconnect with friends and family. I feel my hands grasping to hold on, but it’s like trying to hold on to sand that keeps escaping between my fingers.

And that is the dilemma I have been wrestling with for most of this trip: How can I live at this pace when I return?

I don’t know.

As I prepare for my classes, which I truly love to teach, I feel the pace quicken. As students start asking questions (we have outstanding students are eager to prepare for the July class and know the wisdom of planning ahead), I can feel myself jumping into problem solving mode.

If I’m honest, I enjoy all that, too. If I only had a career to consider, I’d be happy as a clam with a highly fulfilled life… except I’d be lonely and wistful about the family I didn’t have. Thankfully, I do have a family, and that part of life is so full that loneliness is occasionally appealing. I love them even more than my career, but they also require a quicker pace, answering questions, and problem-solving.

These six months have felt more balanced (whatever that is) between work and family. I’ve worked, too. I’ve written a book, kept up with emails, prepped my classes, and planned a podcast launch. But work hasn’t grown to boulder size, squeezing out precious family time. On top of that, I’ve been able to travel, hike, see new places and visit people we haven’t seen in a long time.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

I’m afraid that I’m going to lose everything I have gained.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

I know I can’t stuff all of the sabbatical experience that I want to retain into all that life back in Nashville and contain it all week by week. Instead, I’ll have to cherry pick exactly what I want to keep with me (family adventures, hikes, writing, and having enough time) and what I will let go (yeah, this is the part that is hard).

Tick. Tick. Tick.

And I have to figure it out in 21 days.

“Time is the longest distance between two places.”
Tennessee Williams, The Glass Menagerie

Oregon Hospitality and Coastline

Posted on June 7, 2019June 6, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

After renewing our wedding vows last week, we took the kids to Applebee’s in Klamath and told them the story of our wedding, including the long wait for our first honeymoon dinner and running to Applebee’s next door for an appetizer. Z still tells people we are renewing “our” vows, and when he says it, I smile because it is a family vow renewal now, so it is his, too.

After days of dry docking at a campsite without hookups, when we came out of the mountains, we needed to take care gas, laundry, groceries and showers. I also needed to take care of details getting my classes ready for July.

It started raining as we headed towards Eugene, where we spent four days. On Wednesday, we went to the Eugene Church of Christ and met up with our dear friends Calvin and Alicia and their daughters. For those of you who bought copies of Newly Wed and Newly Cooking, their love story was included.

Even though we surprised them, they cleared their schedules the next afternoon and had us over for an amazing feast of a meal. They clearly have the gift of hospitality: New York strip steaks, jalapeño poppers, watermelon, asparagus, homemade mac and cheese, a veggie tray and more. Even better than that was getting to catch up with our friends, who moved to Oregon from Tennessee about a year ago. Seeing them settled and happy made us feel good, too.

The kids’ eyes nearly popped out of their heads at an enormous pile of Legos, which entertained them for the evening. Calvin has been collecting them for years. A was really impressed, but all our kids loved creating and building. But when we recapped the day and I asked them for the best thing, our children said S and H, their daughters, were the best, even better than Legos.

We might have stayed longer. The church had full hook ups and invited us to stay as long as we wanted. We loved visiting with friends, and every moment felt precious. We enjoyed attending the church and wanted to come back on Sunday. But Tim’s allergies were attacking, and he felt miserable. He’s allergic to grass, and Eugene is the apparently the grass seed capital. That, with all the mowing, meant we needed to move along with a wistful wave.

Even Sunny enjoyed a belly rub from her new friend, S, a dog whisperer if I’ve ever seen one!

We made a brief stop in Corvallis to see Oregon State University and have lunch at local pizza place and then we pointed Joshua’s headlights towards the coast. Tim’s sinus cleared quickly, and as we wound through the mountains, we strained our eyes for the first sight of the beach at Newport.

Giant sand dunes in Newport, Oregon. Brrr. It was cold.

There, we found huge sand dunes and a cold, but quiet beach where Sunny could run free. Pure joy is a lab running free splashing in water. The smile on her furry face was as beautiful as the ocean.

We rounded out the week with a wedding gift from the state of Oregon – free camping! All the state parks were free on June 1^st, including sites with full hook ups. Much to our surprise, full hook ups also included cable (at a state park!), so we watched some HGTV and weather programs. Thank you, Oregon. We got the last full hook up spot, so after a teeth-chattering morning playing at the beach, it was great to relax with some hot tea.

Friends, fantastic food, and free camping… could you ask for a better week?

Hospitality at Home

Posted on June 6, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

We’ve been on the road for about five months now, and we’ve experienced the gift of reconnecting with friends and family along the way.

One of the many lessons from this trip is that our time with others is sweeter in the home.

Our friends Calvin & Alicia Groen at their home in Eugene.

We rarely have people over. After a full work week, scrambling to get meals, and trying to stay ahead of Mt. Washmore, cleaning house to be guest-ready is daunting. I don’t think it is just us. We’ve noticed a trend of people meeting over coffee or at a restaurants instead of backyard barbeques or farm table fellowship.

While meeting in public helps our over-busy selves keep up with important relationships, it isn’t the same as getting into each other’s lives by seeing where and how we live. There is an intimacy, a vulnerability, and an authenticity that happens when we invite people into our homes.

This is one of the lessons that I want to hold onto when we return, but it will require some extra effort. We have a head start with a home that is Airbnb ready, and I like to cook. My fear is that we’ll also return to our old pace of life, and inviting friends over will still be daunting.

When we sit at the table, there is more going on than satisfying hunger. It is sad to think of those who eat simply to satisfy their hunger and who do not permit themselves to linger under the many spells offered by a good meal – the satisfaction of our hearts, our minds and our spirits.
Leo Buscaglia

Renewed Vows at Crater Lake

Posted on May 31, 2019May 31, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

If you keep up with the blog, you know that I’ve missed a week of posting. That is because we took a week off to renew our wedding vows. After a big push to complete editing the book draft, I took some time away from writing, including the blog.

The snow was 10 to 14 feet deep, but the weather was sunny and nice.

I didn’t stop taking photos, though, so I’ll share some extra with you today.

ZA snuggled in her she-snow cave.
Z dug out his own man cave.

For those of you who don’t know us, Tim and I renew our wedding vows every year in a different state. This was his idea because we wanted to stay committed to our marriage in a culture of divorce. Marriage is hard work! Without intentionality around this commitment, it would be easy to lose it even though we value it. This was our 23^rd anniversary, and we renewed our vows at Crater Lake National Park in Oregon.

Renewing our wedding vows overlooking the deepest lake in the United States, Crater Lake.

The kids and the dog served as our witnesses.

A, Z, and ZA learning why we do this
Sunny taking in the view.

We almost changed the plan because it was snowing there and the rim road was completely closed. (We didn’t know at the time that they don’t expect it to open until July because of snow.) The weather reports said it was snowing, and we were concerned about the roads. Thankfully, we decided to at least see what it was like.

A sunk to his hip while walking in the snow. We should have rented the snow shoes.

The roads were perfectly clear as far as it had been plowed, and the snow was beautiful. The average snowfall at Crater Lake is 44 feet a year! We don’t see snow like that in Tennessee. We were not expecting so much fun in the snow in late May. By the fourth day, though, the snow had melted considerably.

In case you are wondering we have renewed our vows in:

Missouri – 1997
Nebraska – 1998
Mississippi – 1999
Washington – 2000
Texas – 2001
Illinois – 2002
Kansas – 2003
Alabama – 2004
Kentucky – 2005
Hawaii – 2006
Florida – 2007
North Carolina – 2008
Alaska – 2009
Virginia – 2010
Georgia – 2011
Nevada – 2012
Indiana – 2013
Iowa – 2014
Connecticut – 2015
California – 2016
Colorado – 2017
Maine – 2018
Oregon – 2019
??? – 2020

It is breath-takingly beautiful at Crater Lake.

A lake so vibrant in color that it looks like a fine art painting.
Stefanie Payne

Giant Redwoods

Posted on May 31, 2019May 31, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

Before leaving the big state of California, where we have been since April 10^th, we wanted to see the big trees, the iconic redwoods. They are BIG!

We left Yosemite and headed to the coast, pausing in Corning, Redding, Eureka (as in Eureka, see the strung-out homeless problems that come from legalized drugs) and Crescent City.

On a rainy day (which seemed quite fitting) we walked the Prairie Creek trail in Redwoods State and National Park. The photos won’t capture it, but I wrote in my journal, “Wow, just wow!”

Some of these trees are more than a thousand years old. Here’s Z with the stats on the aptly named “Big Tree” to show you some perspective. The diameter is about 4 Tims across.

We saw the Roosevelt Elk, named after the president that played a big role in establishing national parks.

Roosevelt Elk
Banana Slugs

The kids were fascinated with banana slugs, many six inches and longer. I guess everything is big around here (but don’t tell Texas). After completing their books, the kids earned their junior ranger badges.

Swearing in for their Junior Ranger Badges
A drew his lifelong buddy, a puppet named Otter.

My mom has talked about a huge Paul Bunyan and Babe the Blue Ox since I was a kid. She couldn’t remember where it was, but told us to stop if we saw it. It’s in Klamath, CA. We did stop, and she was right. It’s big, like the redwoods!

Then, we crossed into Oregon. As June creeps closer, our sabbatical days are counting down. Still, we have more to see and do, including celebrating our 23^rdwedding anniversary. I’m trying not to think about the end of this trip even as I prep my classes for July. I want to keep enjoying this amazing opportunity we have.

ZA is in California and the boys are in Oregon.

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to the body and soul.
John Muir

Contemplation Overlooking Yosemite Valley

Posted on May 21, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

I had my second poignant moment Monday.

Z, A, and ZA with El Capitan on the left, Bridal Veil Fall over ZA’s head, and Half Dome above A.

As you may recall from the post from Pedernales State Park in Texas (posted March 12, 2019), my first poignant moment was sitting around the campfire while the kids were telling goofy ghost stories. As the orange embers floated, the fire popped, and the kids giggled, I felt a complete assurance that this six-month motorhome trip was exactly the right thing for our family. Before that, I thought it would be a good thing (obviously, or we would not have set out on this adventure), but I had a niggling worry that being nomadic would be difficult for the kids after the vacation wore off.

With a couple more months of travel since that campfire, I can still say it is exactly the right thing for our family.

My second poignant moment was sitting on a granite wall with the kids, legs dangling, looking over Yosemite Valley. (For those of you familiar with the park, we were at the tunnel.) I sipped my morning coffee, Z snuggled up on my left, A wiggled on the right, and ZA sat beside him blinking sleep out of her eyes. Tim can’t sit still long enough for things like this, so he walked the dog, refilled my coffee, cooked breakfast and periodically came to look, too. We sat there for about an hour.

We identified El Capitan, Half Dome, Cathedral Rocks, and Bridal Veil Fall, all landmarks we had seen and photographed from different viewpoints the previous days. We picked out sequoia trees, watched a crow fly, and eyed a millipede wiggle with icky fascination. We reviewed what we had learned from the documentaries at the theater by the visitor center, wondered about John Muir’s 211-mile hike in the Sierra Mountains, and lamented not going to the art class by Happy Isles. We summarized our favorite things, so many favorites.

I thought, “This is what I really want. This is what really matters.”

I want to see and learn about new things. I want to watch the wonder on my kids’ faces when they see and learn about new things. I want to gaze at God’s impressive creation and be awed. And, I want to share it with my family. None of those things were on my life list before.

It was a pleasantly, peaceful, poignant moment, and I’m not likely to ever forget it.

When I was talking with my friend Holly at Pepperdine a couple of weeks ago, I said, “For the first time, I have work life balance. Of course, I’m not working nearly as much.”

She didn’t hear the “as much” and thought that was hysterical. She knows the challenge of being a professional and a mom when both roles require more than full-time. I love my job. It is rewarding, fulfilling, and meaningful work. We have highly engaged, energetic students who are self-motivated to learn. It’s kind of a dream. It’s my place where passion meets purpose, and I’m grateful to be able to be part of the Lipscomb family.

But I love my family, too. Three kids in 20 months is exhausting, but I already miss the clumsy spills of toddlers, the first teeth lost, and the serenity of a sleeping infant. These months are flying by too fast. We homeschool partially so we can have more time with our kids.

I’ve accepted that part of this season with young kids means not having enough time. I gave up on Christmas and birthday cards years ago. I haven’t had a garden since before kids, and I don’t have any hobbies. I have not, however, accepted that this season means not having enough time for my family.

For this sabbatical trip at least, we are filling the family bank with lifelong memories. I can imagine my kids as grown adults with their own young kids remembering this view with wistful happiness, telling their children about sitting right here with Grandma, the day after Mother’s Day.I’m usually terrible at remembering photos, but I’ve taken lots of pictures, maybe as an attempt to hold on to moments like this one, looking at Yosemite Valley with my family snuggling near.

“Having somewhere to go is home. Having someone to love is family. And having both is a blessing.”
Anonymous

Birthdays and Mother’s Day

Posted on May 17, 2019May 21, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

Last week captured the essence of this entire sabbatical trip, but it was busier than most. I neared the end of my writing project, we celebrated the twins’ birthdays, and we attended church in Yosemite for Mother’s Day.

You can drive vehicles on the beach here.
A whale vertebrae

First, Tim and the kids dropped me off at an Airbnb for three days of intense editing of the book manuscript. I’ve never done an editing retreat, and I learned some things to make the next one better (see how I’m planning for future books!). I spent 8 hours on Chapter 1, mostly setting up and formatting references. Ugh!

As a result, I didn’t finish the entire manuscript, but I did get 10 chapters done. Once I got going, it went faster and stuck to the plan better, but that first day threw the schedule off. I was disappointed not to finish, but it was still great to be able to get by myself and do a focused edit.

While I was editing, the kids played at Pismo Beach. This is one of the few beaches that you can drive on and set up a tent right on the beach. Sounds fun, right? Instead, they fought the mosquitos at the state park. Joshua kept his wheels on paved streets.

Lots of sand dollars on this beach.

After they picked me up, Z, ZA, and I did a 4 mile walk on the beach, where we found lots of sand dollars.

The Pacific Coast Highway
Elephant Seals molting on the beach.

Then, we drove up the Pacific Coast Highway, my favorite drive in America. We stopped to see the elephant seals molting with pups on the beach, and we watched the sun set as we neared Carmel by the Sea.

Hundreds of elephant seals
Scary friendly squirrels
Not dead, just resting

The second big event was celebrating the day nine years ago when our twins were hatched.

These twins are fraternal. Z wears green, and A wears blue.

Of course, we had cake and ice cream, presents, and lots of hugs and kisses, but we also went to the Monterey Aquarium. On the walk to it, we saw baby harbor seals, less than a month old.

Harbor Seal Babies
We loved the otters most.
Hermit Crabs

After a fine meal at Red Lobster (the twins’ choice), we drove to Yosemite National Park. Tim worked there on a trail crew about 25 years ago, so he was our tour guide. We explored the valley, saw the Mariposa Grove of giant sequoia trees, and learned to identify the major landmarks like El Capitan, half dome, and Bridal Veil Fall.

Joshua and El Capitan

We did not see any bears, but the views were spectacular. I think this is a place the kids will return to, maybe with their families.

Yosemite Chapel

On Sunday, we attended church in Yosemite Valley at the chapel there. It is the oldest standing building still in public use in the park. We hiked to Yosemite Falls in the morning, and rode the shuttle to various hiking spots around the park. We learned about the history of the valley, the influence of John Muir, and the benefits of fires.

Writing, children and family. Yep, that is what this trip is all about. What an amazing week!

Malibu, Pepperdine and Beach Walks

Posted on May 16, 2019 by sabbaticalspace

The first week of May, we moved to Malibu.

First, we revisited my favorite boondocking site, right by the beach. We saw a few more dolphins, and slept to the sound of waves rolling over the sand.

Then, we went up the hill and onto the campus of Pepperdine University for their lectures, a gathering of Church of Christ folk from around the country. They had a parking lot dedicated to RVers, so we had a beach view for the week… nice! We got plenty of exercise going up and down the hills and steps… whew! But when you look up and out over the ocean, it’s not too hard to take that next step, even when you are winded.

That’s the rolling blue ocean.
Aw, ZA and Z holding hands walking across campus.

Dr. Holly Allen from Lipscomb University.

One of the bonuses of the week was getting to see my friend and colleague, Holly Allen. Holly inspired me to start writing daily, so it seemed fitting to attend her lecture the week I finished the last chapter. Besides that, she’s a leading expert on children and spirituality, and I loved the opportunity to learn from her.

A second bonus was ending the week with another visit to Tim’s sister, Shelley, and her family. With a final goodbye, we left and headed north to Pismo Beach for a few days and my editing retreat.

A, ZA, cousin K, and Z saying a final goodbye.

An ocean breeze puts the mind at ease.
Anonymous